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Tijuana Massage

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Date: Tue, 18 Feb 1997 01:31:29 -0500 (EST)

Gentlemen: For over a year, I've been getting sketchy reports about a
strip club in downtown Tijuana called the Club Altiz. Some fellows
described the place in glowing terms, claiming it was full of high-rollers
and gorgeous women. Some reports were less favorable, describing it as a
typical strip bar. The problem was most of the reports gave only sketchy
directions, which caused me to suspect that these fellows were passing
along hearsay. So as part of my continuing program to keep you up to date
on the TJ scene, I set off to find the place and see for myself. Turns out
the directions that are floating around the Net are rather inaccurate. But
after making use of my barbarous Spanish to ask around, I was finally able
to find the place.

The Altiz Club is just steps from the main tourista drag, but you'll never
find it unless you knew exactly where to look. First, you need to find the
north side of Calle Cuarta (Fourth Street), west of Avenida Revolucion and
east of Avenida Constitucion. At that spot you'll find a five-story
parking garage next door to a Caliente sports book.  Believe it or not,
the Altiz Club is at the top of the parking garage. To get there from the
street, walk up the ramp from the sidewalk and into the garage. There's an
elevator, but after 8:00 p.m. it's not in operation, so you'll have to
walk up the same ramps the cars use. When you get to the fifth floor,
you'll see an advertisement for a club by another name painted on the
wall. Don't worry, you're in the right place. Opposite the elevators,
you'll see a doorway. Go through the doorway and up a couple of flights of
stairs to the entrance to the club. The cover charge is $10 and you'll
have to submit to a pat down search for weapons. On the night I visited, I
was given a numbered ticket and the doorman yelled something in my ear
about a drawing later on.

The Altiz Club is a small, rather dimly lit place featuring
floor-to-ceiling windows overlooking Tijuana's city lights. There is a
single, square stage that's lower than the stages you'll find in most
strip clubs. But that's OK, since they've sawed off the legs of the dozen
stools that surround it. In fact, these low stools are all over the club,
as are matching miniature tables. It looks like they bought the stuff from
a daycare center. If you prefer grownup furniture, you can sit at the bar,
or in a few tub chairs they have near the windows. They also have some
leather loveseats that are comfortable, albeit very close to the floor. At
the opposite end of the club from the stage, shielded from view, there is
a separate seating area with three identical leather loveseats. More on
this area later. The music is provided by a spinner and its mostly dance,
house and techno. Mexican beer is $2.50 a bottle.

When I visited on a Saturday night at 11:00 p.m., there were only about a
dozen guys in the club. But the place only seats about 50, so it didn't
seem that empty. I saw no evidence of the San Diego girls who are alleged
to dance at the Club Altiz. Rather, all six dancers appeared to be Mexican
girls. They were above average by dancer standards, but none was a
knockout. The girls each took their turns dancing alone on stage. Often,
they began their set by climbing into the laps of the guys sitting around
the stage and doing a little dry hump while the guys fondled their asses.
On stage, the girls never got beyond topless, but all permitted guys who
tipped them to touch them. Most touching was below the waist and took the
form of ass stroking and the occasional finger slipped inside the girls'
panties. The guys sitting around the stage seemed to know which girls were
a little more daring. When they were on stage, a few guys would lie on
their backs on stage with a dollar bill in their mouth. The girls would
squat over these guys and rub their crotches into their faces. I saw one
girl take it a step further by unbuttoning a guy's shirt, then unzipping
his pants. She lowered her head to his shorts and simulated oral sex for
about 15 seconds while he did the same on her. You won't see that in any
strip club en los Estados Unidos.

Eventually, I was approached by a fresh young brunette who had the cutest
smile. Despite the language barrier, she managed to invite me to retire to
the secluded seating area for "the special." In return for $30, I got a
very full contact topless lap dance featuring some tit sucking and ass
fondling on my part. For her part, the dancer ground her ass into my
crotch and even spent some time stroking my cock through my pants with her
hands and mouth. As Beavis and Butthead would say, it didn't suck. But
considering that for just $10 more, I could get laid by one of the hookers
at the Adelita Bar, I cannot say it was a good value. But it was a novel
experience. As they say on the Net, YMMV.

Before I could leave, they conducted a drawing and wouldn't you know it, I
won. Turns out I got a free lap dance from the girl of my choice. I chose
a brunette with short hair, an elegant face and a great round ass named
Gigi. Her technique wasn't as good as her colleague. Which causes me to
suspect there is a wide variety in technique amongst the girls.

Brockton O'Toole

Date: Wed, 12 Mar 1997 16:22:22 -0800 Subject: Tijuana Strip Clubs Just got back from TJ and found a cheap, easy new diversion to the normal :), I usually park at the lot next to Woolworths and proceed to Zona Norte from there. Never actually touring Revolution, I dont like the tourista sales pitchers and the prices they commandeer, anyway I decided this Sun afternoon to go straight from the lot to the " Carribean Strip Club" directly opposite of me. I heard some good things about Club Altiz from Brockton, however it was closed on Sundays and this was open and close! Nice! very nice! Nice young dancers, who for $10 let you play with their "pechos", fondle their ass, and suck on their nipples! The 3 I " had ", were all 18-21 y/o range. One grinded me real good, even reaching into my pants to rub me a little! Try that in the U.S.A...... BROCKTON: If you have any info on the massage parlors in TJ, please post it! Happy hunting boys!
Date: Sat, 24 May 1997 15:20:59 -0400 (EDT) Subject: Tijuana massage A place to go that I've found recently and enjoyed is a Massage Parlor on AVE 7 & Revolution. Is Bangkok finally coming to Mexico? It's a combination Hair Salon/Massage Parlor that advertises "Sensual Massages". The room is upstairs in the back. For $50 you'll basically get a nude massage and hand relief, and as a bonus, if you know who to ask for, you'll get a very nice, pretty, and thin 19 y/o Latina whose name is mine to keep for now! Great breasts on her! Pretty face!
Subject: [ASP] TJ Report by Minuteman (fwd) Date: Sat, 7 Jun 1997 20:02:15 -0400 (EDT) Massage: Some recent posts have inquired about massage in TJ. Azteca, on Second, just off Revolution has an excellent 45 minute massage for $20. I've tried it once - no sex. They have a sign that says "massage is non-sexual, please respect the technic
Date: Tue, 5 Aug 1997 23:13:26 +0200 (MET DST) Massage Parlors in TJ I've been travelling to Baja California, Mexico, regularly for the last 27 years or so for various reasons (business, sport, adventure etc) but never for female companionship. The senoritas there are so hung up about sex that it seemed to too much of a hassle to me to try to get laid there, even in a whorehouse. Believe me, I lived next to one in my motorhome for half a year and all the putas (whores) used to come to me for breakfast, but I never could get a date with them, even for money. Not that I'm unattractive. Many a European and American female tourist passing though the same campground did not think so, and proved it by multiple orgasms. Anyway, lately there have been ads appearing in San Diego and L.A. papers for massage services in Tijuana. I've been a dedicated connoisseur of that fine, sensuous art for most of my life, to the point that I once took a 100-hour course as a massage therapist. So I decided to check this offer out. Last week (Aug '97) I stopped at the Zagagoza Parking Lot on 9th street (Calle 9) just north of Av Revolucion in TJ, where two massage parlors are located in one adjoining building. (It's easily reached by walking or by bus from the border, if you prefer to leave your car in the USA in one of the border parking lots, or arrive by the San Diego Trolley). I entered "Spa Aristos" at 1650-H Av Revolucion to be greeted by a matronly manager and one "therapist" named Carla, a wholesome and good looking Hispanic Latina (as opposed to the stockier, homelier Mestizas), about 20 to 24 years old. US$25.- was the fee quoted and posted for a one hour massage and "body shampoo" which I gladly paid since this is about a quarter to one half of what I'm used to pay stateside for similar services and only slightly more than in Thailand, a country famed for excellent massage traditions and sex services. The reception area looked clean and stylish. A hallway led to a row of "therapy" rooms like at a doctor's office. My assigned room was about 4 x 5 meters (13 x 16 ft), had a big massage table and a bathtub in it. Clean, but dark and windowless. Carla told me in Spanish to get rid of my clothes and to lay down on the table, than disappeared. I stripped and punched the timer function on my wristwatch. At 4 minutes Carla returned and suggested that she bathe me since I was a bit sweaty and dusty from driving in my open Jeep. The bathtub had a seat installed in it where I sat my naked body down. Carla sprayed me with warm water from the hand held shower head and lathered me down with some deodorant soap. Good clean fun but by far not as sensuous as the "Body Shampoos" I fondly remember from Bangkok. Carla's hands on occasion would lightly brush over my genitals, but seemed to avoid touching them, so I had to take matters in my own hands and washed them thoroughly myself. At 13 minutes into the session the bath was over and Carla dried me off with a big towel. I lay down on the table (the sheet covering it did not appear to be fresh), belly down and Carla began rubbing some flowery smelling lotion onto my legs and back. It felt good to be touched but she had no massage expertise as far as I could tell. At 21 minutes Carla disappeared again and left me waiting until 30 minutes into the session. When she finally returned, she rubbed my back some more and then told me to turn over to work on my front. She kneaded and stroked my tired muscles from my feet to my shoulders and then back When her hands returned to my upper thighs she asked in a rehearsed way where else I would like a massage, I grabbed her hand and deposited on my semi-erect cock. But she removed it quickly and said that would cost extra "cash", a "teep" of $20.-. I quickly decided this would not be worth it, since for $45.- I always got a great hand job from better masseuses at Oriental acupressure places only a few miles north in San Diego and L.A. "No tengo $20.-!". I don't have $20.-, I Iied. Carla continued her manipulations and then departed again, at minute 41. leaving me staring at the missing ceiling times above me, removed to let air and daylight in I figured she gave up on me, so I gave up on her. At minute 45 I dressed and marched out of the room and out of the office. Carla and the "matron" were in the lobby, negotiating with the next sucker. The stared at me in disbelief as I gathered all my bad Spanish to curse their lousy service. I realized she had been playing the most popular game at bad massage clinics: juggling johns. It works like this: Just fill all the rooms with clients who of course have already paid at the door. Then the only masseuse runs from room to room and stays only for a few minutes servicing them. This way the clinic can make 4-5 times the money. On the way to my Jeep I quickly checked the location of the other massage place in the same building, the "Primadonna" at Suite 2022-A. It doubles as a beauty salon. A fat, unattractive, overly made up and perfumed woman of about 30 years answered my questions: Here the service also costs $25.-, but this fee covered only half an hour. Same scam, I concluded. So what's the bottom line: There are no bargains to be had South of the border. Stay stateside or go to the source if you want a good, sensuous massage. $50 or less will buy you a good rub down and hand job from an attractive Oriental female who makes you feel like she's in love with you, either in the good ole' US of A or anywhere in Asia. Not into safe sex? Any street hooker in California will fuck or blow you for $20.- to $100.- and call girls (check the "LA X-Press" weekly paper) will service you in style for $100 to $200.-. A little more you can even catch the whole affair on video for sale and make money with the experience. Porno starlets are available in Hollywood for as little $350.-/half day. General travel info and good TJ map at:
Date: Tue, 06 Jan 98 11:08:00 PST Massages I noticed there did not seem to be a lot of information on Tiajuana Massage Parlors and perhaps I can fill the void a little. I have been to the Azteca and found the girls attractive and the $20 fee reasonable -- the massages are okay and as the sign says the girls do not offer sex. There is another barber shop/massage parlor mentioned in your guide at 6th about 60 yards south of Revolution. The name of this place is the Venus Gentlemen's Club, and it is owned by a beautiful latina called Theresa. In your guide somesays that their is a beautiful brunette in the shop -- however, I have seen the other girls and believe me Theresa is the real beauty. She's 26 and is taking English classes so she can improve on her english which is ok. Theresa is remodeling the shop and will install three booths for massages in private -- she is building a little platform where she plans on having a dancing girl while girls she will hire will give massages. Currently Theresa and her girls give haircuts for $5 and non sexual massages for $20. For $50 you get a sexual massage which includes a hand job. Theresa is a real beauty and she could use the business -- she works for 10am to at least 9pm every day, and if you mention my name (gil)I think she will give you a discount. Gil

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